Today marks a week since we have returned to Japan. I can’t quite decide if this past week has flown by or crawled by. I look at all the things we have yet to accomplish and wonder if the time has gone a bit too fast.
It doesn’t help us hit our goals when our little guy is still adjusting to to Japan time. My parents live in Georgia, which currently is at a 14 hour difference from Japan. All the tricks and tips that help us adults get over the change in time doesn’t really work for a 20 month old kid. Don’t get me wrong, he is a lovely little trouper but at a certain point his body just tells him it is bedtime and no matter how much he tries to fight he can’t help but fall asleep.
We arrived and the next day I was back to work, the little man was back to daycare. My wife’s official schedule gave her a day of rest, but since she is also self-employed there was plenty of work for her to get on with. None of us has had a lot of sleep. Especially when our guy keeps waking up no later than 4am.
And you know who wakes up to keep him company? The Mrs. She wakes up and keeps our little guy happy so that I can get enough rest to make my own day at work possible.
Hearing and seeing her play with our child is a beautiful thing. She gets him laughing and singing and she does it in such a pure way. As if from her whole heart this is what she wants to do. There is no doubt in my mind that our boy feels loved in those moments.
At the same time, I know how exhausting it is to keep that lovely boy entertained. As natural as she makes the play look, there is also no doubt that she is working in those moments. She is working for him and for me.
It makes me take stock and think of how I can give her that most precious gift that she gives to me. The gift of time. The time to do with what we can, whether that be sleeping , working, or just plain doing nothing.
It reminds me that I need to continue helping with dishes, cooking dinner, cleaning, and spending time with our great little guy.
What I can’t do is allow myself to start thinking that waking up early is her job. She is his mother but I am his father. I am just as responsible for his well-being as she is. She is just as entitled to sleep as I am.
Sure, our current schedules means it makes more sense for her to take point on the early mornings on most days, but the days where I can step in I need to do my best.
Our son is blessed with a fantastic mother and I am blessed with a fantastic wife. I need to do right by them both by being the best father and husband I can be. That is a never-ending task.
But she inspires me try.
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One thought on “Wife and Mother”
She is lucky to have an American husband– a man who recognizes her value and intelligence as an equal or better.